Shhh..... Spoilers!

On Wednesday June 5th, the free newspaper The Metro Herald published a spoiler-heavy article on Monday evening's Game of Thrones episode The Rains of Castamere.  The same day, I lost some Twitter followers for making what could be spoiler-y remarks about the same episode.  It got me thinking: what is the etiquette for spoiling something and are there exceptions to the rule?

Oh and... Spoilers abound, for Game of Thrones up to and including The Rains of Castamere, the Doctor Who episode The Angels Take Manhattan, and also for Harry Potter.  All of them.

Why Matt Smith Is My Doctor

April 3rd 2010 is a day I cherish, for two reasons.  One, it marked two weeks since my release from hospital after my appendix (and then the ghost of my appendix) tried to kill me.  Two, it's the day I first met my Doctor.

Game Of Thrones Top Ten: Men

I'm sort of mourning the end of Game Of Thrones.  On one hand, I've read the books, I know what happens! But on the other hand, HBO keep making enough changes that I'm left guessing what will happen, and I like that.  Therefore, I look forward greatly to the next series, I'm pretty excited with where they're going to take it.  Highlights included the zombies coming down towards the Night's Watch, the Battle of the Blackwater, Arya Stark and Tywin Lannister striking up a ridiculously cute and entirely unexpected friendship and of course Peter Dinklage's fantastic take on Tyrion.

This post is about none of these things.

Review Of Avengers Assemble - Contains Spoilers

I had the wonderful privilege of getting to see an exclusive fan screening of Marvel's Avengers Assemble last night, and it was absolutely brilliant. It far exceeded all my expectations and was a perfect example of what a superhero blockbuster should be.

Review of Avengers Assemble - Spoiler Free

I had the wonderful privilege of getting to see an fan exclusive screening of Marvel's Avengers Assemble last night, and it was absolutely brilliant.  It far exceeded all my expectations and was a perfect example of what a superhero blockbuster should be.

Twilight Parody

I breathlessly held my breath as Edmund approached my neck, his long, ivory fangs growing from his perfectly shaped crimson lips. They had the most symmetrical Cupid's bow I'd ever seen. How I longed to kiss them, in all their scarlet marble coolness. I swallowed, feeling my blue, warm, blood-filled vein pulsing in my alabaster throat.

"Do it," I whispered, lovingly, looking adoringly into his large turquoise eyes. "Bite me, Edmund. I belong to you."

He hovered above my quivering flesh, breathing on my neck, making me long to throw my arms around him, to press my head to his cold, perfectly formed chest. Well, I assumed perfectly formed. I'd never seen him without his cardigan and Alf teeshirt on. But somehow I knew he'd have abs of steel, to go with his angelic face. I leaned back further, exposing my neck even more.

"I can't do it," Edmund cursed. "I can't bring myself to hurt you like this, my darling, my angel, delight of my eyes! What if I drain you dry? What if - " he paused and swallowed. "What if I can't control myself?"

Crystallising

The knife went in with a gentle snick and very little resistance. Almost as though he was made of paper. It was a very gratifying feeling, that penetrating slide, and the little trickle of blood that started to seep was like a little bonus for being such an efficient girl. I bent over and licked it, tasting its iron saltiness and savouring its heat on my tongue.

The Doctor In Wonderland

Alice had been spending her afternoon quietly by the river, skipping stones rather badly on its still surface, when she saw a tall, skinny man in a bowtie run past, muttering, "I'm late!"

This would not have been a major, out of the way occurrence, if the man had not been brandishing a strange metal apparatus that was glowing bright green at the tip. Alice was immediately interested and, throwing her last stone directly at her older sister's head to knock her out, she followed the man at a safe distance.

The Doctor Of Oz

The Munchkin had been caught red-handed, trying to steal apples from the Wicked Witch's personal orchard, a crime punishable by death in these fairytale lands, where fruit and veg are prized beyond even gold. That's what happens when your country is surrounded on all sides by an impassable desert.

The Munchkin hung his head in shame. All he'd wanted was a few apples for his Munchkin wife and imminent Munchkin baby.

"I'll promise you my first born child if you let me go!" he cried, terrified, as the Witch stood over him with her huge wand in her hand, its tip sparkling menacingly. "You can do what you wish with her, only spare me!"

Musings: The Eleventh Hour

This new series of Doctor Who is very confusing, and every episode seems to leave a lot of unanswered questions.  Stephen Moffat himself has stated that when we see the series finale, we will look back at all the episodes and see a lot of things clicking into place, like a jigsaw puzzle, and view many things in a different light.  Here is my episode by episode guide to things that I feel may be important later on.

Review: The Beast Below

   THE BEAST BELOW

• Possible Recurring theme of Zero: Prisoner Zero, wrong-doers are sent to Floor Zero

• Reference to “escaped fish” – Prisoner Zero again?

• “This or Leadworth – What will Amy Pond choose?”, possible reference to episode Amy’s Choice?

• Magpie Electrical, the company from The Idiot’s Lantern, is shown.

Review: The Eleventh Hour

Yes I know this is late coming, that even in the States this is an old episode.  Bear with me.

It's not hard to see why this series was originally going to be called Series One.  We're completely starting from scratch here.  New Doctor, new companion, new writer, new theme, new logo, new TARDIS.  Strange then, that not once during this episode do you feel like you don't know what's going on.

Review: Victory Of The Daleks

Okay, I've just rewatched this, and yes, there is a lot about this episode that is complete and utter cack.  The Power Ranger Daleks, the absurdly fast time in which the Spitfires' Gravity Bubbles were built and a horribly over the top Churchill.  Which is a shame because I love Mark Gatiss and consider his Lucifer Box books to be things of joy and wonder.

Review: The Time Of Angels/Flesh And Stone

For review purposes I watched these in one go, and I'm so glad I did because to be honest, separately they confused the hell out of me!  Quite possibly this review will confuse the hell out of you too, because I'm trying to work theories out in my head while writing it and it's a bit all over the place.

Review: Amy's Choice

I honestly don't know where to begin with this review.  Amy's Choice is by far the most confusing episode in what is a very confusing series, but it is also my favourite episode so far.

Review: The Hungry Earth/Cold Blood

Things went downhill from the moment I realised Chris Chibnall had written these episodes.  He's written some good stuff for Torchwood, "Adrift" being the standout to my mind, but usually everything he does seems contrived and unoriginal.  He completely lost me by bringing a god-awful long lost brother story to Torchwood, and then further alienated me with his dreadful episodes for Doctor Who, including this two-parter which is just utter rubbish.

Review: Vincent And The Doctor

Let me just wipe a tear from my eye... There I go.

I've just re-watched Vincent and the Doctor and it still affected me as profoundly this time around.  In my opinion it's the greatest episode of this series so far, and overall from the reboot, it's up there with, among others, The Waters of Mars and Blink.  This is because it took the time to develop the character of Vincent van Gogh, so in the end when we see what happens to him, we really do care.

12 Awful Episodes Of Doctor Who

Mostly, Doctor Who has been wonderful for the past five years.  Three great portrayals, brilliant monsters, engaging storylines and wonderfully dodgy CGI.  It warms the cockles of your heart.  

But just occasionally, episodes come along that make you wish you could feed them to Amy's Crack.

Review: The Lodger

I'll freely admit it, when I first saw the trailer for The Lodger, I saw James Corden and automatically thought: "This will be shit."  I hate Gavin and Stacey and I just thought it was a stunt casting in what looked to be a filler episode.  I will also freely admit I was pleasantly surprised.

Review: The Pandorica Opens

The rug has been pulled from under my feet, my jaw is on the floor, my head has been well and truly melted.  Stephen Moffat, you're a genius - you played us like a deck of cards.